What the @*%!

Well this is a post I would love to pretend never happened! Today was absolutely the worst day of my life!!! Ok well not the whole day, but this evening ~ shockingly scary!

I'm starting a new job in 2 days, so my stress level is slightly high, but I'm excited to get out and do something and have the kid's go somewhere that I know the people and believe they will be safe and happy. Well the only problem with the new job is the dress is not jeans and sweats, and since everything we own is still in storage I need clothes. It had been a long week and I asked Mark to watch the kids so I could rumage in the storage and try to find something and then run to the store for anything else I would need. Anyways Mark and the kids were here with his brother, wife and their 4 kids ~ all playing happily. I went rummaging and found nothing, but more toys for the kids and some dress clothes for Mark, so I headed to the store. Mark called and asked me to pick up pizza and everything was fine. So I get back here and carry in the pizza and asked his brother where Mark and the kids are and he tells me they are upstairs, but AJ is out in the backyard with the kids. I don't let my kids play outside with an adult, because I feel they are too young, so I was instantly a little annoyed that he was only with kids out there, but everyone is giving me a hard time lately at what a paranoia freak I am, so I'm trying to relax and figured I would get the bags and then check on him. WELL, one of the cousins come around from the backyard and says, "Where's Aidan?" Immediately panic sets in... even more so when she says, "oh, he's in the car" I kept asking where he was and we couldn't find him in the swings or by the pine tree.... at this point anger sets in and I can't figure out where the adults are!! So I run into the house screaming at Mark, grab TK and run back outside. There is a good deal of landscaping here and a huge, deep creek in the backyard, so I probably spent 5 minutes or so screaming for him and running around the yard. By this time I'm in tears and having a panic attack and everyone else is out looking for my baby boy. Well I started going down the street screaming and see a man and boy riding bikes, so I asked them.... in between the crying... if they had seen a little boy in gray pants. Well the boy had!! I couldn't believe it.... he just wasn't sure where they had seen AJ (he was probably 5 or under.) So I'm running after them... still caring TK. I stopped at another neighbors that I saw pulling in a asked them... they hadn't seen him, but offered to hold TK ~ I must have given them the evil eye, 'cause she kinda stepped back after she asked me and I just shook my head. I'm thinking, NO WAY! ARE YOU KIDDING ME ~ I'M ALREADY MISSING ONE CHILD!!! So I start heading back across the street to grab a phone to call the cops, when the man and his boy come back honking their bike horns at me. They had found him all the way down the street with another family. Now all the way down the street is a good long ways, even more so when you are completely out of shape and still having a panic attack. (Mark told me later he has never heard me scream or cry like that.... I said well I never lost a kid before!) By this time Mark had gotten the car and was driving around and drove past me, so I told him to follow the man on the bike ~ I'm not sure why I didn't just jump in the car? Anyways there AJ was in this driveway with this family... they were waiting for the cops to show up, because AJ told them that his parents were at work and he was looking for his cousins. So we sat in the driveway and cried and hugged for a few minutes and then went back to show him where his cousins were. We have a new rule we are going to be repeating everyday.... probably about 100 times a day. "We do not leave Nana and Papa's without mom or dad." I have no idea how to drill this into his head how dangerous that could have been. I have no idea how he got sooo far away.... although the family that found him said he was really power walking! The rest of the night was filled with many breakdowns on his end, but I didn't mind one bit, in fact I was glad to hear him yelling, because at least I could see and hear him.

I'm saying a prayer tonight for all those families whose children are still missing.... I can't even imagine what they go through. For 15 minutes I was in their world and there wasn't anything, not a single thing that mattered, but finding my lost child. I'm crying now as a type this and just thanking God that He is giving me a second chance with AJ. I can't even start to describe the fear I felt.